* 200 articles. Two years. Whelk. The best of Upsideclown. Might be reprinted.

This Clown is Cancelled

21 November 2002
George is a slacker


Full refund for all tickets at gate.

Producers and artists of George ClownTM apologise for the cancellation.

All other tour dates expected to continue as planned.

* * *

This performance of "George's Upsideclown" is SOLD OUT. Please do not ask our employees for tickets, WE DO NOT HAVE ANY LEFT.

Please do not buy tickets for "George's Upsideclown" from ticket touts outside this theatre - THEY ARE NOT HONEST. We will not accept fake tickets and you will waste your money.

This performance is SOLD OUT.

* * *

Hey, UpsideFans!!

Missed your chance to read GeorgeClown the this time around? Start saving your pennies now - the next edition of the famous clown's work will be out in 3 (count 'em!) weeks, just in time for Christmas! George, the most junior and curly clown, promises that there will be no disappointments next time around, just good clean fun!

Can't wait?? Check out the back-catalogue at the bottom!! Woo!!!

* * *


There will be NO CLOWN this week. Normal service to be resumed on Monday.

NO CLOWN this week.

Please ask in the lobby for further information.

* * *

Pleading exhaustion brought on by jet-lag, George Clown failed to produce his clown for the ClownMaster this week. Seemingly showing scant regard for the thousands of clown fans that he will disappoint this week, George stifled a yawn and said, "I simply didn't have time". Continuing with unlikely excuses George C added "I just couldn't find an internet café in New York that would let me do word-processing. It was the net or nothing, and I couldn't afford to spend two hours online."

So, despite spending 4 days in the most cosmopolitan city on earth, George couldn't find a simple Word programme? But the cheap pleas just kept on coming. "When I got back, I had to work for a day in the shop, then a day at the council. This is the first chance I've had to do any clown-related activities. I'm so sorry."

Sorry? This from a clown who has time and time again failed to meet deadlines? The ClownMaster has shown himself to be merciful to MC GC's continuing slackness. But this time, with results of George's sheer bloody-minded laziness affecting millions of clown buffs worldwide - will the fans forgive??

* * *




This is the fucking archive

Current clown:

18 December 2003. George writes: This List

Most recent ten:

15 December 2003. Jamie writes: Seven Songs
11 December 2003. Dan writes: Spinning Jenny
8 December 2003. Victor writes: Rock Opera
4 December 2003. Matt writes: The Mirrored Spheres of Patagonia
1 December 2003. George writes: Charm
27 November 2003. James writes: On Boxing
24 November 2003. Jamie writes: El Matador del Amor; Or, the Man who Killed Love
20 November 2003. Dan writes: Rights Management
17 November 2003. Victor writes: Walking on Yellow
13 November 2003. Matt writes: Disintermediation
(And alas we lost Neil, who last wrote Cockfosters)

Also by this clown:

1 December 2003. George writes: Charm
10 November 2003. George writes: Dead beat
20 October 2003. George writes: Shortening
29 September 2003. George writes: Manhattanites are Cleavage-Starved
11 September 2003. George writes: How to Bring Us in Line With the Future
18 August 2003. George writes: Slashtastic
28 July 2003. George writes: Underground Independent Small Press Comic Fight Club
7 July 2003. George writes: Careering
16 June 2003. George writes: Choose your own adventure
26 May 2003. George writes: Revelations
8 May 2003. George writes: Picture Perfect
14 April 2003. George writes: MetaPirate
24 March 2003. George writes: Preparation X
3 March 2003. George writes: F of x
13 February 2003. George writes: Three is the magic number
23 January 2003. George writes: Recorded Delivery
30 December 2002. George writes: Meat Bingo or Death
12 December 2002. George writes: Royal Inquisitor
21 November 2002. George writes: This Clown is Cancelled
28 October 2002. George writes: Shopping with God
3 October 2002. George writes: SaferSpoony
16 September 2002. George writes: Supercalanthropomorphicexpealidocious
26 August 2002. George writes: The deformed animal menagerie
5 August 2002. George writes: Plaice that Funky Music, Whitebait
15 July 2002. George writes: Safe as Houses
24 June 2002. George writes: Two Lions (DB/DS)
30 May 2002. George writes: Series 8
9 May 2002. George writes: Market Stall
11 April 2002. George writes: I, the Enlargened, Crunchy Product
18 March 2002. George writes: Cakexterminator
21 February 2002. George writes: Fiction Suit
28 January 2002. George writes: Spunk Gunk
31 December 2001. George writes: Fairytale of New Pork
10 December 2001. George writes: Circular
15 November 2001. George writes: A Man With No Ass Is No Man At All
22 October 2001. George writes: One Night in Heaven
27 September 2001. George writes: Uncut
3 September 2001. George writes: Porn Pants
9 August 2001. George writes: Names of the Roses
19 July 2001. George writes: No Fun Here
21 June 2001. George writes: All Your Elections are Belong to Us
28 May 2001. George writes: Pierced as Fuck
3 May 2001. George writes: My Lovely Horse
9 April 2001. George writes: Eight Hundred and Forty-Three
12 March 2001. George writes: Kill 'Em All
19 February 2001. George writes: Formal
25 January 2001. George writes: Sticks and stones
11 January 2001. George writes: A Thought on Morality
11 December 2000. George writes: You can't put that into a soufflé
13 November 2000. George writes: Lyrical Genius
19 October 2000. George writes: Wet wet wet wet wet
25 September 2000. George writes: Built on an Indian burial ground
31 August 2000. George writes: This Way
31 July 2000. George writes: Runt of the Litter

Let meeeeeee entertain you

We are all Upsideclown: Dan, George, James, Jamie, Matt, Neil, Victor.

Material is (c) respective authors. For everything else, there's

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